Wait: Chapter #1

Marian squeezed her eyes shut as the loud off key singing from her loved ones surrounded her. Today the discomfort of attention stuck with her. After two years, it still didn’t feel right to celebrate her life on the day her father had lost his. It wasn’t fair to be happy without him, was it?

She gave a half-hearted smile as cheers and clapping sounded through her doubts. Seeing her mother and brother so excited to present the cake they had worked tirelessly on together lit her up inside. 

“Happy Birthday to you!” The large grin on her mother’s face and a lopsided pink party hat on her brother’s head only made her want to cling close to them for however long they would have one another.

As the two began to fuss over the lopsided orange candy-striped candles in the pink frosted cake, Marian looked to the sliding glass door leading to the backyard patio. 

Smoke seeped through the crack behind the tall man standing there. His grey hoodie wrinkled as he lifted a hand to his head and pushed back the long pieces of dark hair that brushed his pale ears.

Only Eun seemed to mirror the dark cloud she felt overshadowed the day. Although it was in his nature to be quiet and reserved, her birthday seemed to always give him the twinge of sadness that gripped her insides everytime she woke up and realised her father’s absence yet again. 

Would there ever be a time when it didn’t hurt to miss him? 

“Marian, honey?” Marian looked back to her mother as the candles continued to blow out before she could make her wish. 

Marian let a small laugh escape, “Don’t you think twenty individual candles is excessive?” 

Her brother, Damon stopped trying to relight the candle he had brought himself eye-level to and squinted his timbered green eyes at her. 

“Excessive?” he and their mother said at once.

Veandra leaned away from the cake. Her lime dress sat high on her slender deep taupe shoulders and billowed as the back door opened. Small curled fly-aways blew in her short hair as the wind invited itself in to take shelter from the early autumn night. 

“Stop making up words, Mari.” Damon joylessly joked as he re-lit the candles and pushed the cake back towards her. He stuffed the lighter back into his cargo pants, the same lighter Marian had hidden from him countless times before in an effort to at the very least delay his smoking habit. 

Damon was lucky. He didn’t understand just how lucky he was. He had received all of the physical attributes from their parents that Marian desired: Her mother’s height and their father’s green eyes. The Marines had made him strong; far more muscular than what she  considered healthy for his body size. And yet, whomever he desired fawned at the sight of him. His natural charisma helped him when his physique could not.

She touched the red sable of her upturned nose—the same one they all sported and concerned herself suddenly about the way she looked. 

Dull? 

She tried to be more positive even for a moment but, dull, small, and insecure were the only words that began floating about her mind.   

She took a sip from the chilled glass in front of her as critiques floated through her mind. Surely she liked something about herself, didn't she?

 She looked down at her chest for a moment, not those. Far too small. Maybe her rear? But it was so hard to find jeans that fit over her thick thighs, not to mention a pair that also fit her cheeks. 

Wind splashed through the open back door, forcing a shiver down her spine. She tucked a strand of her espresso, straight, shoulder blade length hair behind her ear before it swept away with the gust. 

Singed tobacco burned her nose as the wafting of Eun’s smoke break drifted inside. She gagged to herself, judging both her brother and his best friend for their awful habit. It had killed their father, and she wasn’t sure she could take losing one of them to it too.

The dulcet tones of his warm voice always struck her heart. “I know you’re judging me, Marian.” She met Eun’s melted chocolate eyes as she gave a short nod in agreement. He blew one final smoke ring out the door and stepped on the finished cigarette on the porch before closing it. 

“Oh, I am. Heavily.” She said to him as he passed behind her. She tried not to pay attention to his strong cologne as he walked away, the smell of smoke unfortunately following him. She faced the leaning cake once more, wishing away the burning in her cheeks.

 “Happy birthday.” She jumped in surprise as Eun came back behind her and whispered in her ear. His rich chuckle rippled down her neck and sent tingling fear through her chest. 

She turned her head back over her shoulder to watch him walk away. With all of her might, she could not pry her eyes from the width of his back. 

Marian put a hand on her heart as it pounded. Fear quickly dissipated into gripping want. He looked over his shoulder at her; a smug smirk laying off his lips as he remained satisfied with himself. She admired his glossy black hair sitting straight around his snowy ears and his pink grin. 

Eun wasn't pretty. 

His facial features were stronger than the soft eyes and nose so many men in their twenties could possess. His brows were thick bushes over his typically dark eyes—though they could fluctuate from a dark glare to honeyed brown with his happiness. But what she loved the most; the soft brown freckles across his cheeks and nose that seemed endlessly… 

She paused. 

Loved?

 Marian shook the word away as she looked away from him. 

If she thought hard enough, of course she loved him. But not...that way. Did she? 

For the past sixteen years she, Damon and Eun had all been friends. But he and Damon had been truly inseparable, never doing something without the other. Even when it came to his sibling. 

As far as Eun was concerned, after the love and care the Coupley family had given him, Damon’s sister was his own sister, even if his own parents had never had another. 

Eun's parents, the Jeong's, weren't the warmest people. Marian could only recall being in their home three times since she had met Eun. Only briefly were they in his sickeningly organised home. Everything had its place, and things with no place had no purpose. His parents were rarely home. They were practising doctors with half the town as their regular patients. 

Marian understood why Eun frequented the Coupley’s home instead. It was truly home; with life, colour, and messiness. For sixteen years he had been over for almost every second, and was considered to be her parents' third, and favourite child. They had been the only people to support him when he decided to not practise medicine after he had gotten his licence. 

Eun wanted to teach and his parents had been furiously disappointed. But here, in the Coupley’s arms, he had found acceptance and encouragement. He had received his teaching credential quickly and accepted his first position as a professor at the state college nearby. Age had been no barrier for him, and he was constantly pushing himself to strive.

“Mari?” her mother called.

Marian looked to her mother as she broke from her thoughts. “Yes?” She said cautiously, not having heard a word she had previously said. 

Veandra smiled deeply and dimmed the lights in the dining room. “We can’t cut the cake until you make a wish.” 

While her family all sat around her, Marian looked at Eun, making eye contact with him briefly as he gave her a small smile. She bent down towards the tiny abundant flames, and watched them flicker in the haze of the dim room. ‘I wish he could see me.’ 

She puffed her cheeks and blew steadily. As more cheers erupted, Marian hoped her wish would take hold. Any change would suffice. Even if not for the better.

❀

Eun stood silently in the doorway with Damon as they began their silent approach. Marian wouldn’t know they were coming. 

He watched her fix the waistband of the small shorts that could hardly contain her full brown cheeks. The black lace of the lingerie styled pyjamas rested just below her hips. The small tank top that matched stretched over her hardened nipples undoubtedly from the open window in the corner. He knew how much she liked the cold. 

He paid close attention as she bent over, reaching under her bed for whatever it was that she was looking so closely for. Her petite body rounded off beautifully near her hips and down to her plump rear. 

Through her movements he could tell that confidence constantly evaded her. But she had so much to be boastful of. If her obvious beauty wasn’t enough—her mind, her humour, and her kindness were always leagues above his own. 

What was wrong with him? 

Eun breathed away his lust. Hadn’t he done well the past two years to keep his promise? 

 But Eun couldn’t help himself as Marian changed. How could she be twenty? Where had the time gone? Was she still young and naive? Of course. But in the last two years it seemed like the age gap between them grew smaller, insignificant. Did he notice? He would have been a fool not to. When she had blossomed, everyone noticed but her. 

Her breasts were still small, but her hips and thighs had filled out graciously and her height stayed far below his own. The small beauty mark above the left corner of her lip seemed sexier as she grew, instead of adorable like he used to believe. 

How could so much have changed in only a few years?

“You ready?” Damon whispered behind the open door.

Eun looked down at Damon, his six foot height below his six and a half. “Maybe we shouldn’t. She seems busy.” He whispered back as he looked down the darkened hall and down the stairs as their mother, Vee, walked by.

“Don’t turn into a wimp about it now.” Damon said with force as he held the cake higher, and began to creep into his sister’s room without Eun.

Eun stayed at the door and watched, a warning on the tip of his tongue as her brother snuck up on her. She was truly awful about being aware of her surroundings. 

He leaned against the door frame again, just as Damon jumped on her, slamming the piece of birthday cake into her mouth and nose. “Damn it, Damon!” She shouted as she jumped back, dropping the picture frame she was holding onto the ground as she began wiping pink frosting from her face. 

As Damon laughed deeply, not noticing as her emotions changed from anger to deep embarrassment and sadness when her eyes connected with Eun. 

Eun stopped his leaning while her eyes welled up with tears. She looked at them both as the cake fell onto her thin top. Tears fell as she passed Eun, leaving sniffles hanging heavy in the air. 

 “Mari…” Eun whispered to her as she passed, remorseful that he hadn’t stopped Damon. From where he stood, Eun could see what Marian had been looking over. Splatters of frosting covered the image that she kept of herself with their father, both smiling at the photographer. 

“Come on, lighten up Mari!” Damon said in defence as he watched her go, oblivious to her mourning. 

Knowing what had pained her, Eun picked up the picture and wiped the icing off of the frame as he sat it on her pink blanketed bed. He looked into Rick’s sparkling eyes as he kissed the top of his daughter's forehead. The picture reminded Eun of where they had all been on this same day, two years ago. 

The fluorescent lights in the waiting area of the emergency room seemed to brighten each time Eun closed his eyes. The faint sobs and filtered anxiety of the other occupants clung to the walls, making the space between the clean white walls tighter. The hard seat of the chair irritated him as he laid his back against the cool wall. 

He had looked over to Damon, his elbows resting on his knees as he covered his face with his hands. His brown ears reddened from his frustration as his leg violently shook from impatience.

 He reached over the empty seat between them and laid a hand on his best friend's shoulder. Eun breathed inwardly as he delayed his own grief. Now wasn’t the time to be for his own sorrow. All he could continue to provide was friendship. 

Eun looked up as Marian came from the bathroom. She wiped at her swollen eyes, her full lips chapped and tightly pressed into a fine line. Her hands clutched at her brother’s tattered black jacket closed over the still damp new yellow swimsuit on her body. She sat down between them as Eun moved his arm to give her space. 

Marian's red eyes looked to Eun as he spoke to her. “It’s going to be okay, Mari.” He whispered, hoping to believe it himself. The tears she tried withholding continued to fall from her eyes. He watched as Damon lifted his head and took his sister's right hand in his own. Damon squeezed it tight before he returned his gaze back to the floor. Eun could feel the same pain that was eating at her chest, poisoning the air in his lungs. 

Eun remained still as Marian laid her head on his shoulder, wetting his shirt with her tears as she attempted to quietly sob. “What are we going to do without him, EJ?” She asked unhappily into his body, sniffles covering her words. He stayed silent, not having a good enough answer for her. Instead, he raised his hand and placed his arm around her shoulders as she leaned closer into him. He saw her hand tighten with Damon’s. 

Was it cruel to say that her father's death had made them closer? Through the passing emotions of disbelief, shock, and anger, only Marian seemed to share the particular pain Eun was feeling; complete devastation. While he was sure Veandra and Damon felt the same, Marian's language, her tears, felt as if they were his own. 

Before that fatal birthday, she was only one of his closest friends, together since they were young. But that day, she had stirred him to lessen her trauma anyway he could. He had been forced to consider her closely; bonding in understanding for the pain they were sharing.

Watching her heal over the past two years had been a gift. 

In the beginning Marian had taken her father’s loss the hardest. She locked herself away every chance she could. She had lost touch with all of her friends, her presence at school became nonexistent, and her weight had fallen dramatically from lack of eating and drinking. She had turned her home into a prison of her own making, and after two months Damon had had enough. 

The shouting that night reminded Eun of the liveliness that had once existed in their home. “Just get dressed, Mari! We’re going!” Eun heard Damon shout as he stomped down the steps, Marian's door slamming shut behind him. 

Eun nodded to Damon as he came over and plopped angrily into the worn brown recliner. He had been trying to get her to come down for hours, it seemed the night would not go as planned. Eun checked his watch, seeing it read nine p.m. “Is she coming? The last showing starts soon.” 

Damon closed his eyes, counting to five as he breathed. “She’s coming. Even if I have to drag her. She can’t do this anymore.” He had been tired of watching her fall to pieces, knowing nothing but cold and sorrow. If they all had to continue living their lives without their father, why did she get a free pass to wallow? “We all miss him. He wouldn’t have wanted her to do this.” 

Eun agreed as Damon began to vent. As the older sibling he had taken on his father’s role. But it was clear that he was struggling to be the lead man in their lives as they tried to put themselves back together. But he had his own unhealthy coping mechanisms: going out every night and not returning until dawn. To Damon next to nothing had changed, and he was determined to continue living his life as he did before. 

Eun fought becoming protective—even from her own brother. It had only been a few months. Marian was just trying to survive, as they all were. “She just needs time.” He said to Damon, knowing if she had the choice, she wouldn’t want to be surrounded by darkness.

Before Damon could respond, he looked over to the stairs, hearing footsteps descending. 

Eun stood, clutching his car keys tight as Marian came into sight. Her fine hair tucked behind her ears, blue roses lined in silver resting in them. A simple veridian dress hugging her small breasts, clinging to her wide hips as it rested above her knees. He saw her cling her bare arms across her chest, looking to the ground instead of their watching eyes. Her eyes were still puffy from her tears and the tip of her nose hadn’t relieved the blushed hue spreading from her cheeks. 

That moment had been more than realising her body had blossomed. It had been the understanding that their lives had been changed, and they would have to decide what that meant for them, and their friendship. 

As she slowly looked up into Eun’s eyes, he felt the corner of his lips forming into a smile. “You look beautiful.” He spoke softly in Korean to her, knowing she needed the encouragement.

Damon glared at Eun as he spoke sincerely to her. Unlike Marian, he had not attempted to learn his best friend’s first language. But as his sister’s eyes sparkled towards Eun, Damon knew he did not like the tension thinning the atmosphere. “Let’s hurry." He interrupted their locked trance, "We still have to pick up a few things from the grocery store on the way back.” Damon allowed her to walk away first. As Eun moved to follow, Damon stepped between them, and gave Eun a look of warning.  

Eun had felt that in the moment he had been wrong to openly admire her beauty. Why hadn’t he noticed it before? The way her beauty mark graced the left corner of her lips, her acute freckling on her full shoulders. It had been too obvious, and for that he was ashamed. 

As they had sat together during the movie, Eun and Marian’s closeness had been deathly. The new perfume her mother had given her for her birthday drifted from her clean freckled skin. Even in the dark he could see warmth in her brown cheeks. Her eyelashes fluttered here and there as she watched the screen. He took deep breaths as florals radiated from her soft neck. 

Although the movie had been intriguing, and quickly became one of his new favourite paranormal movies, Eun couldn’t help catching glances of her, making sure she was comfortable as he sat between her and Damon who had taken it upon himself to scream and cover his eyes everytime something jumped from the foreground. But as a heartwarming scene played, the lead actress consoled her father as he passed and struck a chord close to home. 

Eun noticed her wiping tears from her eyes. 

Not catching himself once more, Eun had reached for her hand, taking her small palm in his as she looked up at him, no longer watching the movie. He turned his face to hers, not paying attention to their surroundings as her brown eyes softened. He watched her perform her nervous habit, her bottom lip drawing between her teeth as they searched each other for understanding. He felt his mouth drying, unsure of how to proceed as her chest rose and fell with her pulse. He kept its pace as it quickened in his palm. 

As Damon  let out another shout, Eun jumped, turning his gaze back to the movie screen. He shifted in his seat, fighting off the pull that had begun to sink his chest. Distracted, he tried to follow the plot line once more. But having not let go of her hand in her lap, he felt her rest her head on his shoulder. He shut his eyes in an attempt to not let her closeness lower his defences, but he couldn’t help himself. Eun leaned his head closer to hers, resting his cheek in her hair.

It had been his fault. He had crossed boundaries that he had failed to recognize. It had been no surprise when Damon had come to him after they returned home. While he hadn’t noticed the moment they had shared in the movie theatre, their departure had been enough to infuriate him. Eun had had no choice but to adamantly deny that he would ever pursue her, and promise to keep his distance whenever Damon deployed. But it hadn’t changed what had woken in Eun. It had only prolonged his efforts. He had attempted to quell it with other women, but Marian’s image alone caused his heart to quicken.  

Returning to the present at the sound of shouting, their mother appeared in the doorway behind Damon, anger funnelling from her nostrils. A glance down the hallway provided her an eyeful of cake smashed on her only daughter. “I told you two to leave her alone! You know today is hard for her!” 

“It was just a joke, mom!” 

Vee shook her head. “Eun, baby can you please go talk to her?” She said sweetly to him, knowing he hadn’t been the ringleader. He hardly ever was.

He nodded his agreement as the two began to argue, pain filled subconsciously in their voices. It was hard on all of them. 

He walked around the corner to the bathroom, standing silently on the carpeted floor in the hallway as he listened to her cry, not having the courage to knock. “Mari.” He called softly outside of the door, hearing her stop briefly. Her tears still stung.

“Go away.” He rolled his eyes at her reply, knowing she didn’t expect him to. 

“Can you unlock the door?” He rested his head against the wood as he waited for her to comply. Hearing the lock click, he stepped back, allowing it to open. 

She only glanced at him, cake in her lashes and hair. “There, now you can both keep laughing at me.” 

He watched her as she turned the water back on, steam circling the sink from the high temperature. “Maid Marian, why are you crying?” 

She tried to fight the small smile that broke for him. Only he and her father had ever called her Maid Marian affectionately. Damon had been banned after teasing her relentlessly for years because of her love for Robin Hood. It was a passion she had shared with her father who could never admit that it was precisely where he had taken her name from when she was born, and continued to read it to her every night when she was young. She looked at him smirking in the fogging mirror. “It’s nothing, EJ.” She whispered as she took pleasure in the hot water on her face, hoping they would erase the feeling of her tears on her cheeks.

“You wouldn’t cry if it was nothing. You hardly cry for anything now.” He came in, leaning against the sink as the yelling outside grew in volume. He shut the door behind him. He heard her laugh at his suggestion. Eun knew she considered herself to be a crybaby. 

She turned the sink off, patting the water on her neck and cheeks with the hand towel. She kneaded the fabric in her hand, not wanting to think more about it. But as he stood behind her–the door closed to allow them privacy–she bit her lip, wanting to say more than what was on her mind. Why had he stopped coming around as often lately? Whenever Damon deployed, Eun seemed to disappear right along with him. What had she done to make him go? 

“Do you ever miss him?” She looked up at Eun as he leaned against the bathroom wall, his hands his jean pockets. “My dad?” She followed as he crossed his chest and shifted.

He did. 

Rick was the first one to know that Eun wanted to teach. Eun had been astounded when Rick wasn’t disappointed in him like his parents had been. He had been supportive through and through. Rick was always loving and open, something he had been intensely jealous of when they were young. 

Whenever Damon and Marian had needed encouragement, someone to speak to, their father had always been the one by their side. Her eighteenth birthday had been more than a milestone. It was the day that they had all lost a great love. 

“Everyday.” Eun said simply as held her gaze, hoping not to give too much more away. 

She shook her head, not understanding. She threw the towel down angrily, scowling at him instead of adoration in her doe eyes. “Then why do you do it?” 

He knew this argument. It seemed he couldn’t ever make it through a sitting with her without it surfacing. “I can’t just quit, Mari.” He sighed as she grew upset. It wasn’t that simple.

“So you’ll wait until it kills you instead? You’re supposed to be a doctor, so don’t tell me you don’t know what it did to him!” As tears breached her lids again, he cursed. He hated her crying. He knew smoking was awful, he knew it killed him, but he was thankful that she cared enough about him to demand that he stay alive as long as he could. “I know you could quit if you really tried.” she finished quietly as she trembled. 

He heard her plea as she stopped speaking. He looked down at her, his eyes slowly searching hers. 

Had her lips always been so full? 

The bow tip of her top lip quivered under his gaze. He looked at the whipped cream still attached to her jaw, he reached his hand out, stroking his white thumb underneath her brown chin. In his palm he felt the soft warmth of her skin and her heartbeat quickening in her neck. Touching her now felt different than all the times they had hugged innocently. 

Marian tensed as he touched her, not wanting to move. 

Above her, his eyes clouded with emotion she couldn’t recognize. She felt the pad of his thumb smooth over her, slowly leading to her lips. She saw him narrow his gaze, focusing on her as her heart quickened in pace. His thumb lifted up her bottom lip, sinking gently into her mouth as she unconsciously parted for him. 

He heard her short shallow gasp as his thumb slipped between her lips. Her small hand lifted to hold onto his wrist as it continued to move on its own. “You missed a spot.” he chuckled with her as she came closer to his chest. He watched her unsure brown eyes flickered between his and his chest. He took her hip in his hand to guide her closer underneath him. 

Marian fought a panicked swallow as he towered over her, his eyes unwavering as he held her close. She stopped herself from questioning his actions. Wasn’t this exactly as she wanted? 

"I won’t hurt you Marian.” He whispered against her lips. He wanted so badly to see her eyes mist over just as they did whenever she looked at him. He saw her eyes shut tight in protest, but her lips owned her bravery and closed around his knuckle. He looked away from the top of her head to the light blue tiled wall behind her with a silent groan.

Marian hummed as she tasted the salt of his skin mixing with the sugar of the whipped cream icing dragging along her tongue. She closed her lips around his thumb, suckling gently as held her tighter.

Eun felt his heartbeat  in his thumb as her tongue flexed and cradled it with pleasure. In half of a second, she sucked it, making him withdraw it quickly from between her lips. The urge to replace it with an appendage far more sensitive hazily crossed his mind. 

What was he doing?

In his heart he couldn’t feel that this was the same girl he had grown so close with. How could he tarnish the bonds that they all felt for each other? He would decide later.

He tilted her up to look at him and held her pulsing neck, her heart rate increasing under his fingertips as her slowly opening gaze drew him in. 

Marian lifted to the tips of her toes and took a breath as their noses touched, sharing his air for only a moment as they craved intimacy together. She felt her stomach somersaulting, her brain keeping quiet as her heart screamed for him. “EJ?” she whispered in question against his lips, feeling his softness grazing her own as she spoke. It was their last chance to turn back before they were consumed. 

Neither dared take the opportunity. 

Eun watched as Marian's dark eyes closed gently, her long black lashes swept her warm blushed cheeks. Her chest pressed further into his stomach as she leaned further in. Hope alone stilled her as she waited for him to connect to her pouty lips. 

He felt her heart pounding in every place he held her; his hands cradling beneath her bottom’s cheek and under the flimsy top on her curved upper hip. As he closed his own eyes, throwing caution to the wind, he felt her breath tremble against his lips.

Marian felt his face coming closer to her own as their breath intertwined, pushing and pulling as their warmth mixed. Her shaking nerves rested in her hands. She gripped his jacket tighter on the small of his back to keep herself from stepping away.

As Eun’s lips finally met hers, her mind went blank. 

She could only focus on his soft touch, and his sweet taste. After only a moment, he pulled back to look into her eyes. Shocked honey met swooning brown as they sought permission from one another for more.

Eun's caution gripped Marian’s heart. 

He had the power to make her feel so safe and cared for without touch, but the gentleness and concern he showed for her in intimacy locked into place in her heart. His one kiss had proven to be far better than anything she had imagined. 

Eun hoped he hadn’t been mistaken. He hoped he hadn’t misread the tension that had accumulated for much too long. But as her hooded siren eyes only stared dreamily back at him and she whimpered happily for more, he dove back into her lips with unconcerned fervour.

Marian moaned in shock as his fingers intertwined with her hair and he held her neck. She rubbed her thighs together, feeling all the warmth and passion he passed through her lips pooling between her legs. His tongue pressed against her own between their locked lips, sweetly struggling as his hips pressed her backwards into the cold sink.

Then she did it. 

As their soft kisses turned feverish, Eun heard Marian’s deep moan, her tongue vibrated against his own as she took pleasure in him. He knew it would be false to say he had never dreamt about the small noises she made in passion.

Surprised by the sounds she was making, she parted her mouth wider for him as he took over.

 His roaming hands invited her to touch him as she liked. Her shaking fingers met his chest, the chest that she had only ever felt through hugs. Every whispered groove gave way to the plains and valleys of creamy skin, taut and nearly blemish free. 

She felt his hands travel down her back, over the flare of her hips, and come to rest on her bottom. She stopped herself from shivering with need as he squeezed hard, one cheek in each of his large hands. 

The raw want, the pulsing need for him to consume and touch every inch of her skin was deliriously blissful. She wondered if every interaction would feel this way, or if what they shared was unique. She opened her eyes briefly and saw his flustered white cheeks, his delicate nose, and his furrowed brows drawn together with focus. She never wanted this moment to end. If only he could be this close every minute of every day.

Marian heard her heart beating rapidly in her ears, covering her mother and brother screaming at one another in the background. How good it felt to be lost together with Eun. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he stepped between her thighs, pressing his erection into her tummy. 

“Oh…” she gasped with a break in their lips, shocked at how hard he was.

She watched his blush redden further and his hair fall from behind his ear. Marian pushed the stray locks back, following the curve of his ear as she caressed him. He breathed deeply and closed his eyes. She smiled as he enjoyed her touch. She had never seen him this way before. 

Eun opened his eyes, her tilted smile and the fogged mirror behind her made every second more real. With her hand in his hair, and her thin top straining against the hardened peaks of her breast the forbidden things he had felt for her were made reality. What had he done?

Marian drew concern on her features as vulnerability turned to dread in his eyes. 

Reason returned to Eun’s mind. Shame and fear begged him to release her while he still had a chance. She deserved far better than he was able to give.

“Marian…” Eun shook his head as he stepped away from her. “I’m so, so sorry. I have to go.” Eun tried to keep calm as he grappled with what he had done as her eyes begged for explanation, he felt lies squeeze between his teeth. “I just…had too much to drink.” 

Marian watched as Eun continued backing away. “Oh… okay…” He opened the door, leaving her in the quiet of the bathroom, the mirror the only witness to her fantasies playing out.

Eun felt himself collapsing with panic. 

Thoughts ran through his mind at lightning speed, accusatory and intrusive as part of him begged to go back to her standing in the secret filled bathroom. But his rationality stood fast in the face of desire. ‘Don’t touch her.’ He shook his head as he heard Damon’s request repeatedly in his mind. ‘Just don’t fucking touch her.’ What had been so complicated about this? After everything Damon and his family had done for him, why had Eun done it?  

He tried and failed again to relax as he grabbed his car keys off of the table, not stopping to say goodbye to anyone else. Had Eun really had too much to drink? No. Not a drop. He tried to close the door quietly behind himself to not alert them that he was leaving.

Safely making his way from the door, he took the steps three at a time and stopped in the shadow of the darkened house that loomed next door. Late summer fireflies were dwindling now, the moon beams through the clouds lit just enough of the immaculate houses on each side of the street leaving a clear view of his sporadic escape. 

He stood frozen in the driveway, paralyzed with the weight of his decisions. 

His parents' quiet house silently judged as he fought with the possibility that the home he had built with the Coupley’s would be lost, just as everything else had proven to be. And he would have no one but himself to blame.

What would he do if he had just ruined the only home he had ever had? “Fuck!” He shouted into the night as he tousled his hair in frustration, moving down the remainder of the driveway as quickly as he could.

Marian kept her fingers attached to her stunned lips, half covering the gape his surprise had caused. Slowly her smile spread, her eyes shutting tight as she replayed the moment in her mind. She looked around, making sure no one had seen, but with the door closed, how could they have? 

Marian remembered the first time she had wanted him to touch her, the chills of the moment then unlike the heat coursing through her now. When her mother had suggested a pool party, she had hesitated, knowing she had almost no one to invite. But it had been mutually agreed upon that her eighteenth birthday was one that needed to be celebrated. With her father's worsening health, they all needed the happiness being together could provide. 

She had invited the other students from the debate club, knowing almost none of them personally. It had been a surprising turn out, something she had regretted vigorously. She felt unbearably naked in front of everyone with the strings of the yellow flowered bikini her mother bought for her, seeming to have a mind of their own. 

It wasn’t until the very end, when everyone was beginning to go home that all of the towels placed out had disappeared, leaving her shivering in search of another. Marian remembered dripping onto the carpet in the laundry room, causing the counter to become wet as she climbed the shelf, her fingers needing a few more inches until they reached the thick warm towels. 

“You’re going to hurt yourself, Mari.” She heard his voice in her left ear, the depth to it implying other pain than a simple fall. She didn’t have to look behind her to know who it was. Feeling him come closer, she gasped lightly, his lips nearing her neck as he leaned forward. His chest grazed her wet back as her bottom curved over his bulge. His hand reached past her, up into the cabinet as he removed the towel for her, lingering instead of backing away as he placed it in her hands. 

She encouraged herself to look back at Eun, wanting her body to move as he stayed close. She turned her head slowly, meeting his eyes as he looked down at her. She eyed his pink lips, hearing her heart racing in her ears. She held her breath as his head seemed to near, the body heat from his fingers inching closer as they came towards her hips. “Marian?” Her mother called, causing her to open her eyes, catching just as he turned the corner down the hall, fleeing before they were caught. She had gone straight upstairs, touching herself to his image as she called his name, wishing they had had just a few more moments. 

“Marian?” Hearing her name in reality, she looked to her mom as she popped her head into the silent bathroom. “Did EJ leave?”

“I think so…he said he was, um… tired.” She lied as she removed her fingers, not wanting to seem flustered in front of her mother. 

Vee noticed  a brightness to her daughter's eyes that had not been there before. “Oh, okay. Are you feeling better now?” Seeing Marian nod in confirmation, Vee took a moment and wished Rick could be there to see how beautiful their children had become. Marian, Damon, and even Eun-woo had become stunningly beautiful people. Although they had emotional growth waiting ahead of them, Vee’s pride bloomed each time she gazed at them. Where had twenty years gone?

Vee took Marian for a hug and patted her back. Her brother could be cruel. “Forget Damon. I think we all just cope with today a little differently.”

Marian nodded her head to her mother's words. True. She had cried, unstopping for weeks. Damon had thrown himself into his habits, smoking, women. Eun had thrown himself into his work. Her mother had seemed unfazed, only far away looks in her glazed eyes now and again. They were all still putting back together the pieces of their family after they witnessed her father collapse on her birthday. 

Sudden guilt corrupted Marian’s soaring heart. What if she and Eun being together disrupted all they had left? She hoped against hope that things would only change for the better. 

 

To be continued...